fighting the depression

Fighting the depression
Its 6 am nurse quick grab his medicine,
He’s foaming Excedrin, my god he’s trying to kill himself again.
Ram into the room to find me ripping the brackets,
Off the belt lignin attached to my fucking straight jacket.
Grab a nurse placed the syringe filled with air,
Next to her jugular vein if she doesn’t die she‘ll be impaired.
Just before I pumped this bitch fool of death
I’m tackled shackled to the ground pinned in the lean and rest
Wish I could say I’m vexed
But as my head hits the ground it cracked open the cage where my feelings were repressed.

Manic depressed bi polar with low self esteem,
So if you don’t think I got shit to loose
look at my noose marks I dream
aren’t there, till I awake and feel them still there..
I have nothing left except life,
That’s why I torture myself just to show god spite.
My father transferred his love through surgical tools,
My mother played the heroin to a man addicted to heroin …this fool
My mother allowed loving us from his haten
Life was like Eve left Adam and resited wedding vows with Satan.
Awakened, every morning mourning the life I could have had
And the brother that could have been there if he wasn’t murdered by my dad.
That’s just the beginning, grew up sinning
Self-loathing pondering ways to bring myself an ending.
By 10 smoking pot, using the resin slots as mulch for my future funeral lot.
Discovered embalming fluid by the time I discovered my dick,
Aids epidemic was my only hope so I stayed raw in these chicks.
Carving my skin, draping in black too
Hate filled torture my body serrated then covered them with tattoos.
Step fathers assault n battery became my battery
Now I’m charged fueled up badly.
Became antisocial even though this isn’t my fathers mistake
I cant say shit being me was my fate.
Tried suicide 9 times 12 if you count trying it for fun
How am I supposed to have confidence if I couldn’t do it right with a gun?
I’m only here cause this is hell
Or a cell in a heavenly jail ,gave up powder for tranques and jell..
Like fuck reality I can create my own one man society
Where nobody picks on me and outsiders envy.
The perfect world I see it every high in its glory
Only to calm down and be rushed to purgatory.
I got emptiness no more places of skin to hack
So how much do I value life? Enough to give it back.

http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/show...64#post3387064
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/showthread.php?t=245617

upping

Yep another dope piece from you, the last piece i read was a punvhline piece so it was cool to see you posting up some of your darker deeper verses.
I loved the concept cause it was dark and you know thats my style too so you know i was really feeling this verse. You told the story well you told it from one perspective so you never strayed off topic or got inconsistent with the concept which always helps story verses out.
Your vocab fitted the piece perfectly nothing over the top so the piece never became cryptic or a chore to read which is always good. The imagery was my favourite part of the piece you had some good descriptive imagery very graphic which always draws people into your verses more. You had some nice lines in this piece the one about your mother being a heroine and in love with a heroin addict i just loved that line. And you closed the piece off well the last couplet was probably my favourite lines in the piece.
Return the feed on my Om:
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/showthread.php?t=245014

uppin

This was a straight dope drop, nuttin wrong with it to what i could see, everyline was telling a story and had really good imagery in there, multi's was satisfactory and there was heaps of lines that was nice as hell. The ending was well created, i liked it and i don't think it could have ended better, realy good read, i'd say 9/10..keep droppin

this was tight.
had great emotion from it. though the flow came a little bit off at time. you expressed this from your mind but the vocab could have came stronger to paint more images but it came decent creative in alot of ways some lines shortened so work on the structure and also work on the flow so that it's more understood when itz read. very hot

return the feed
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/showthread.php?t=245028

Aight I Feel That