~Ultimate~

http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/show...hreadid=102136
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/show...hreadid=101684
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/show...hreadid=102175

Stand alone on the wasteland, experience first hand/
The weight of the world crumbles at the devils command/
Try to understand this place is just a test of our fate/
A reason to make it, through this society hate/
They try to relate, when really they haven't a clue/
What life is like in the cycle, they don't see it as you do/
Can't peel back the layers of the curtain that covers our eyes/
Shields our minds from the torment, of racial demise/
Look to the skies, as you fall to your weary knees/
Hands held up in prayer, hoping the Lord sees/
Does he hear you? does he turn from your pleas?/
Does he recognise the hatred, that sprouted from disease?/
So many questions put forward to the forgiver of sins/
They say that in sudden violence, nobody wins/
Then explain to me why war is such a probable thing/
Sure, it solves peoples problems, but then the real shit begins/
Cleanup takes longer than dirtying it in the first place/
When the trauma is over, theres still lives to replace/
Trouble to face, hurtful shit to erase, will we ever learn?/
Will we ever pull together and see this is disgrace?/

this was simple in wordusage but perfect in compleity of rhyme structure...this the first read i seen from you and i enjoyed it alot looking forward to viewing more of your work

thanks for the feed, appriciated greatly..

this was tight piece...like WORD said...it was simple but ur complexitivity n structure was all good.....keep doin ur thing son

yeah were pretty tight....................wordplay lil simple, but flow were sorta made up fo that..................peace....................... .......................

yo this was hot.....word choice could of been better....but other than that it was hot...stay up

It was pretty cool. Good topic, but work on the flow and jazzing up the lyrics a little bit. You don't have to make every lines a sentence.

again like word said the wordplay was pretty basic but you had a constant flow through the whole piece which made up for it. structure was real good. keep droppin. peace.

Quote:

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Originally posted by Gene Pool
again like word said the wordplay was pretty basic but you had a constant flow through the whole piece which made up for it. structure was real good. keep droppin. peace.

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when he was born his gene pool didn't have lifeguards. :)